TOLLYJOY Baby Day 2018

This year is the 4th year of Tollyjoy Baby Day and I am beyond happy to be a part of this special day to celebrate our babies. Tollyjoy Baby Day is a partnership between Tollyjoy and OrphanCARE Foundation and each year they came up with topics that is related to parents and children. Last year we talked about the importance of nutritions for our babies. For this year, we discussed about infant mental health and surviving postpartum depression. As a mother, I myself are concern with what is happening around us. Stories about mothers who committed suicide due to postpartum depression is alarming and should not be taken lightly. Postpartum depression is real and it could happen to anyone, even without realizing it. 

When I had my children, there were times when I felt like crying and screaming all the time due to stress, lack of sleep, exhaustion and so much more. I know it was not depression, it was just a stressful phase during that confinement period. But I know I have to talk to someone, to tell them how I'm feeling just to let it off my chest. Trust me, it makes me feel so much better. If somebody comes up to you to talk about their feelings after they had a baby, please do not brush them off and be a good listener and advice them if needed. 

As I mentioned earlier, the topics discussed during Tollyjoy Baby Day were Infant Mental Health and Surviving Postpartum Depression. What is infant mental health? Does it even count because they are just born? I myself never think about this so much as we as parents are always focus on providing the best in physical things, but what about their mental health? Infant mental health is the infant healthy social and emotional development. It's how they experience, regulate and express their emotions, form close and interpersonal relationship and explore the environment through learning. 

Infant mental health is crucial as it aids in the child's development, how they look at a situation and translate it into their mind. A constant chaotic household (parents arguing, violence/abusive parents, drug or alcohol problems, lack of social support, etc) may cause the infant to have sleep or feeding problem, over/under response to things around him and a possibility of a physical illness. And as for us parents, it could result in a poor connection with our kids and neglect

What can we, as parents can do to promote good mental health?

♥Connect and communicate with your baby through smiling, touching, talking, singing and massaging

♥ Take time to understand your baby's behaviour and cues

♥ Be responsive to your baby's needs

♥ Be the place where your child can find comfort when they are scared, upset or hurt

♥ Develop daily routines to achieve stability and consistent

♥Surround children with nurturing and loving environment through practicing good relationships among members of the family

Jessie also touch on the subject of postpartum depression among mothers, and fathers too! How do you know whether you are suffering from depression?

It starts off with Baby Blues :

1) Tearful

2) Overwhelmed

3) Fatigue

4) Sleep Deprivation

5) Irritability

6) Stress

7) Isolation

Then continues into Postpartum Depression :

8) Trouble connecting with your new baby

9) Anxious and worry 

10) Panic attacks

11) Feeling incapable and guilty - the syndrome of wanting to do everything without help then when that is not achievable, it turns into the feeling of incapable and guilty

12) Feeling violent or aggressive - wanting to hurt your new baby

13) Suicidal thoughts - the most dangerous point where it is crucial to get help

Reading all these key points, I absolutely have the baby blues. I experienced from number one until number 6. I am really thankful that I have my mom, my husband and my sisters to help me out during these times. :') If you have any of the symptoms, do seek help and talk to someone. Talk to new mothers, your close-knit family members and make sure to take care of your basic needs such as sleeping. Getting enough sleep is crucial, for me at least. When I have enough sleep, I am in a happier and better mood because I am getting enough rest. If talking to others or fulfilling your basic needs are not enough, do seek professional help.